There is no denying that nearly any newlywed couple faces a challenge — be it in-laws, family planning or the color of basement throw pillows. For Stonybrook, Long Island native Laura Leigh Abby and her new wife Samantha “Sam” Abby, uniting from a superbly stylish, feminine couple for seven years (they were sorority sweethearts) into a married team has led to a series of compromises that are now being documented on the Season 2 of Bravo’s hip and revealing Newlyweds: The First Year. LIB Magazine recently talked with the leading girls who are determined to make their marriage win.
What was it that made you both want to be a part of this show?
S&A: As a young lesbian couple during a time when marriage equality is part of the daily national dialogue, Newlyweds: The First Year seemed like the right opportunity at the right time. We wanted to show viewers marriage from our vantage point, and let a younger audience know that it’s okay to be different, that you can find a partnership that works for you. Happiness is possible. Love and family is what matters most to us, and I suspect that’s how most people feel. We believe that all couples have more in common than most of us realize.
Did you have any fears going into this experience?
S&A: Of course! What if viewers hate us, what if our story doesn’t represent the lesbian community in the way we hope it will, what if we look bad? These are just a few from our list of fears. We do, however, have an incredible support system of family and friends who don’t expect us to be perfect and love us anyway. We can only be ourselves, the rest is out of our hands.
Did you feel like your love was truly put to the test?
S&A: Marriage is hard. Having it filmed makes it even harder! But being on this show made us want to be our most true selves; let them see the good, the bad and the ugly.
What was the biggest challenge you’ve faced so far being married?
S&A: Learning to compromise. It isn’t easy and it doesn’t get easier, but we are both learning to slow down and not merely listen to each other, but really hear what the other is saying.
S&A: We wouldn’t have agreed to do the show if we weren’t in a solid place. You have to be confident in revealing yourself this intimately, but on the flip side I think watching the show will allow us to see ourselves from a new perspective. We also have our first year of marriage captured on film. That’s something we can always look back on – how fortunate are we?
Do you have any advice or tips to pass along to other newlyweds going through their first year?
S&A: Be patient with yourself and your spouse. Neither people nor circumstances change over night. So speak to each other, and listen to each other, and believe in each other. Chase those dreams and do it together, because that’s what makes a partnership. Oh, and have sex! We’re all only going to get older, make time for pleasure.